Holy smokes. I have been working on the Friday post for about 10
days. And still, I didn't manage to get it posted on Friday. Argh.
Things have been ridiculously crazy here.
So, a belated
Happy Veterans Day! Especially thinking of my Dad, all three
grandfathers, father-in-law and husband today. So proud of them all for
their service. There are assorted other cousins, and uncles who were in
the service as well. Funny, but I never really thought about our family
being one with a military history, but I guess we are!
Also
notable, was the 11th marked the six-month anniversary of our big plane
trip from Korea. I sort of have mixed feelings about this. To be very
honest, we are still working on attachment, and some part of me thought
we'd be way past that by now. I know attachment is a long process. But
it still bums me out.
I cringe when I hear other adoptive
moms talking about how they and their child started to bond instantly,
and remind myself that everyone has their own journey. I'm not sure I
really believe that "instantly" thing, and wonder if some adoptive
parents are seeing their children through rose-colored glasses and
perhaps aren't aware of the signs of struggle their kids might be
having. (I admit that I'm jealous of these stories though!) It sounds a
bit unrealistic to me. But I try not to compare our lives to others. I
only know what our journey has been, and it has been a slow process.
We
did have a lovely weekend. Short, but lovely. On Friday night we went
to a tree lighting event that was really fun. Hung out with our best
friends and their sweetie, B. Goofed off on Saturday with the fam before
I had to work. Made pancakes on Sunday morning. And then went to a
friends baby shower (solo!) which was really nice.
I
realized how rarely I get away for a few hours to myself, and have to
admit that I felt a little guilty about it. I found I was anxious to
return, and kept wondering LM and his daddy were doing. It was good to
be away for a bit though. When I got home, we all had a good play
session outside. Nothing fantastic this weekend....just hanging.
Saturday we received some of our finalization paperwork. We are
still awaiting one more piece of paperwork from the state and then we
can set our court date. Yay! Getting so close now.
And, finally, today is World Orphan's Day. I have never liked the
word 'orphan'. And it positively breaks my heart to think of LM ever
described that way. I guess I think of him as 'displaced' before we were
matched with him. He had a family---we just hadn't found him yet.
Fortunately
in LM's life, he was always loved and cared for. We are thankful for
that (thank you SWS!) and today, I hope that some of the world's other 145 million orphans grow to know the love of a family too.
***********************
To find family: World Orphans Day
To remind them you love them: 143
To eat! Chocolate Caramel Apple Cookies
To get out of your head and into your body: How to get out of your head
To help bridge the gap: Parent education: Social Coaching Tips
To pottytrain: Free Superhero Potty Training Chart
You are not alone. Neither of our 2 kids were immediate bonds. And for a long time I thought my 1st hated me and/or I must be the worst at motherhood for him not to warm to me instantly. I especially thought this because the other adoptive families I met also spoke of instant or near instant bond. I like the rose colored glasses idea of perception.It is plausible.
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